hapa | hale

hapa | hale

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cherish your children

This evening, Kanoa, Kala‘i and I will attend a memorial service for a 16 year old boy, Kai‘o...who tragically died in a car accident last week. His grandma works with my mom. I've been helping the ‘ohana design the program for the services, so have been getting to know him a little bit through the pictures and poems that have been submitted for the program. I look at my boys - Kanoa's the same age - and pray, so hard, for Kai‘o's ‘ohana...for their loss and the pain of missing him.

I can't imagine it...so I say, mahalo ke Akua! Thank God, praise the Lord every day that your child is there for you to wake up, to run around to various activities, and yes, to even nag. Better yet, take a moment to hug your child and thank God. Let your eyes light up when you see your child at the end of a long day...for isn't that what we live for? Aren't they our future, the light of our lives? I know my boys are. So ‘ae, mahalo ke Akua.

This song by Nā Leo Pilimehana reminds me of feeling so blessed when both of my boys were born...

You Don't Remember

You don't remember
I'll never forget
That blessed day when we first met
And I saw the face I always knew
The little smile, the little you

You don't remember
I'll never forget
One day in my life I will never regret
To feel such love I never knew
All bundled up right there in you

(Chorus)
As I held you near my heart I understood at last
The part of me I never met
You don't remember
But I'll never forget

You don't remember
I'll never forget
That blessed day when we first met
And when I heard your voice I realized the truth
Everything in my life would lead me here to you

You don't remember
I'll never forget
One day in my life I will never regret
A gift so precious giving me my angel love
Truly a miracle of God above

(Chorus)

And when I look into your eyes
I see the reason why I've lived my life

(Chorus)

Oh you don't remember
But I'll never forget
You don't remember
But I'll never forget

almost lover

Don't you just love when you come across a song that resonates with you? Here's one my heart could have written this past spring...


Almost Lover

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Hawaiian* lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick
I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be
So long my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images
And when you left you kissed my lips
You told me you would never let me forget these images
I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be
So long my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
But so you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy
To walk right in and out of my life

Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be
So long my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

~ A Fine Frenzy

*(Spanish)

~ qwiki ~

unconditional love

once upon a time there was a person who swore they would love you forever. their love moved on but your love stayed in the same place. consider the opportunity to love the greatest of all blessings, even when love doesn't go your way. the love you give is the love you get and it is all good no matter where love takes you. let the ability to love another belong to you forever and ever because real love stories never end.

~ philosophy

hau‘oli lā makuakāne

On Father's Day, we went to church then celebrated my dad with lei + his favorite brunch at the Maui Prince. It's so important to take the time to honor him because he's usually the one behind the scenes, quietly making our hectic lives run smoothly with everything he always does for us. It was a beautiful day to let him know how blessed we are to have him in our lives. I love you Dad!

~ Remembering Uncle Jimmy Kapohakimohewa ~

Also on that special day, I found my thoughts turning again + again to my hānai dad. I met Uncle Jimmy + Auntie Judy through church. They remind me of my own parents: Uncle's Hawaiian like my dad, Auntie's haole like my mom + they're both very loving people. For some reason, Uncle Jimmy + I were drawn to each other from the very beginning. He sings, I dance...nothing brought us greater joy than to share our love of music together. We both love nā honu, and he always made me feel so special on my birthday by gifting me with something honu-related. I loved hearing his rumbly bass voice in choir, and miss seeing him in "his" seat.

I was very blessed to spend some time with him in the hospital while his spirits were still up and we thought he was coming home. He played "Hanalei Moon" on the ‘ukulele so I could dance; now that will forever be “our song.” There was a lot of laughter in his hospital room that night, and I am so grateful I can remember him that way. Uncle Jimmy was such a warm, giving man with a huge heart + smile...I still feel his spirit, but sometimes I miss him so much!

I just came across some letters my boys wrote for our church’s youth group newsletter last year. It was for a section honoring Uncle Jimmy. Here they are:

I really appreciated the quality time I had with Uncle Jimmy, whenever we'd have a nice time to talk story. When I came to church, we would share how our lives were at the time. He would always give me a big hug and a few words of wisdom. I wish I could have spent a lot more time with Uncle Jimmy.

Uncle, you will always be in my heart.

Love, Kanoa (15)

~~~

I don't really have only one favorite memory with Uncle Jimmy, but I know that whenever I was with him, it was a good time. Everyone who knew Uncle knows that he was always one to put a smile on your face and lift up your heart. I remember the last time we saw each other. He greeted me with, “Hey boy, you getting big ah?” That just made me smile.

I went to church for the first time in a while a couple weeks ago and just knew that it wasn’t the same. The energy was not the same, and the blowing of the pū (conch shell) definitely wasn’t the same. At keiki time, I happened to look over at Uncle Jimmy’s seat, and I knew that even though he wasn’t sitting there, he was with us in spirit. In my heart I could hear his voice tower over all others and it made me cry on the inside. I miss him, and I know all of you do too.

Kala‘iomākena (14)

a matter of perspective

This summer has started off with me saying "a hui hou" to some very special people. Two of my best friends moved away from Maui - one went to Vegas + the other is on her way to Kentucky. Kentucky! Huh (roll eyes here)...just kidding, roomie! *:)

I could look at it as the summer of goodbyes because I also "lost" another very special someone before these two friends left...but after many hours of soul searching, I've realized that as with so many other things in life, it's all a matter of perspective.

The beautiful painting above by artist Jia Lu (zha loo) is entitled "Departures." One can imagine the woman gazing longingly after someone who has just left...or patiently waiting for someone to return! Goodbye, or hello...cup half empty, or half full? Painful experience, or valuable lesson learned?

I make a conscious decision to live positively every day, so although my heart aches + misses my friends, I choose to believe that ke Akua allowed their paths to cross mine (in each case, more than once) for excellent reasons. I feel extremely blessed to have known + loved these people + as Diana kept reminding everyone, I will not say goodbye or aloha...but a hui hou.

"hea i ka haku" ~ shout to the lord

Aloha ~

On April 28, I asked for prayers for my friend + hula sister Kris' mom, who was in the ICU. Auntie Kuʻulei has since passed away; her service will be held tonight. Auntie Kuʻulei had so much aloha for Kelsey, her granddaughter + Kris' daughter...so tonight, we will all dance "Hea i ka Haku," as sung so beautifully by Holunape, in honor of Auntie Kuʻulei. This has always been a favorite of mine + I will picture her sweet, joyful smile the whole time...

Hea i ka Haku

E mele au i ka ho‘ola e
He nani no
He nani no
E Iesu, ku‘u ho‘ola
‘A‘ohe lua Ou
I na la a pau
E ho‘omaika‘i
I kou aloha kamaha‘o.
Ku‘u kokua, ku‘u malu
Ku‘u mana e
Ku‘u hanu, ku‘u ola
E hi‘ilani mau a mau

HUI
Hea i ka Haku
E himeni ke ao
He mana ke Ali‘i, e ho‘ihi e
Uluhia ‘o luna me ko lalo e
I ka lohe i kou inoa
Himeni hau‘oli i ka hana ho‘i au
He aloha mau ko‘u
Ku mau a mau
Kukahi ka nani ke paulele au ia ‘oe

.

Then sings my soul, My saviour God, to thee
How great thou art
How great thou art
My Jesus, my Savior Lord, there is none like you
All of my days I want to praise
The wonders of your mighty love
My comfort, my Shelter
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath, all that I am
Never cease to worship you

CHORUS
Shout to the Lord
All the earth, let us sing
Power and majesty, praise to the King
Mountains bow down and the seas will roar
At the sound of your name
I sing for joy
At the work of your hands
Forever I'll love you
Forever I'll stand
Nothing compares to the promise I have in You

~ Darlene Zschech

three rules of work

1. out of clutter, find simplicity.
2. from discord, find harmony.
3. in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.

~ attributed to albert einstein